tokimi: (Default)
Yet another insomnia post of "I should be asleep". I should be! But I'm not, and let's look at how we got to this point. I blame Aion almost exclusively. Between Dark Poeta and the epic group ganking in the Abyss afterwards, it kept me up late.

But at least now I'm getting sleepy. Will have to set an alarm to wake up before noon. Having to be responsible and all that rot.

Grandmother's 90th birthday party is next weekend. That should be interesting with the extended family showing up by the droves, I'm sure. I'm preparing with Regan on how best to handle that the week prior. Putting in all those supports and the like so I have plans on what to do if the situation becomes too hectic. Which is good.
tokimi: (watching)
Click me, I'm not forcing this to load on your friend's page. )

Only been waiting for this game to go into beta for like... 2-3 years. If NCSoft can do Aion without it being a grindfest the way L2 was, something tells me it may be the ground breaking MMO people have been waiting for. The PvPvE system sounds rather intriguing, breaking down the game into 3 factions, only two of which are playable, the last being NPC only. Not sure how it will handle, however. It remains to be seen.

But damn, is the game gorgeous. And you can fly in it as a matter of course, changing the PVP system from being 2D to 3D.
tokimi: (innocence)
Tiptoeing towards an unknown precipice. Skirting the edge and balancing between solid ground and that gaping chasm. Pretending to be the most confidant girl in the room, while really falling apart at the seams.

It sounds emo. But it's just sorta how it goes sometimes. I'm not unraveling, it just feels like there's some huge cataclysm around the corner. And while the latest drama in "the Saga", as it's obliquely referred at the moment (sometimes with a name to clarify, tonight, however, not), has mostly been dealt with, it still feels like something else is going to happen to stress me out. Things, on the horizon, but maybe not. Maybe just me, ready to fuck things up again.

I want stupid things that mean a hundred things, fade away and retain those meanings. Flowers and pirate frogs, though the latter is for my magnet collection on my fridge. It's a new collection. I have a bunch of hieroglyphs and like... 3 normal magnets. I'm sad to have lost the violin magnet that made noise and annoyed people like awesome. Or was that just annoyed me?

I think Dawn said it best earlier today: "Cryptic post is cryptic." I just rambled more, and she got to the point.


Nov. 25th, 2008 05:50 am
tokimi: (meeeee)
What's in a name?

Loads of things. Margo is a smart and creative name, apparently. Go us Margos.
tokimi: (Default)
I meant to say something here, but that was nearly an hour and a half ago. I got caught up reading Cleolinda's Movie in 15 Minutes: Twilight and about died laughing. All of you Twilight fans and anti-fans, go take a look, it's hilarious.

Anyhow. I had meant to write about some of the more recent stuff going on here, but I was happily distracted finding and reading the Twlight thing. I did get a chance to talk to Curtis, and then Justin a bit later though, since Decky flaked out on me a few days ago and hasn't bothered to try to get in touch with me since. I've had some stuff on my mind the last few days and very few people to talk about it with.

Suffice to say, karma feels like it's rearing its ugly head again.

Of course there's more to it. I just haven't said anything about it. When I wake up, maybe.
tokimi: (sorrow)
Halfway through October.

The Sox lost the Championship game. Boo to that.

I'm considering what sort of under the table jobs I can get. One of my guildmates on WoW got a job as a phone sex operator. Our GM suggested "Lucy Taco" as her operator name. This is hilarious. I wonder how hard it is to do the job.

I should write more. Even if it's smut. There's half a story on my smut journal, which I still haven't shared with interested parties here, yet. Not sure how to really write more. I need to update my journal more often. I say this a lot. It doesn't seem to have any effect.

I've been experiencing bouts of depression.
tokimi: (Default)
Skimming through my LJ user pics and I found this one. I didn't upload it. I didn't change it.

If my account was hacked and this is the worst they did... interesting. Otherwise. I have no idea how to explain it, unless Lj's fucked up somehow? And, even though I have 7 more userpic spaces available, and it says it's uploaded the attempt at a new one, it's not working.

I changed my password for save measure.

Insomnia blows.

EDIT: 8/29, 8:15am - It's been fixed, and the userpic is displaying properly. Talk about weird.
tokimi: (prayer)
I don't know if it's caffeine or insomnia, but I am still awake. This isn't a cause for celebration, especially as that I shall be busy through most of the day in a few hours. Therapist, then some shopping, then home, then dinner, raiding, and then finally, after 9pm, being able to kick it and relax. I don't know how I will manage this.

I'm suddenly inspired to change the layout and colours on my Livejournal. This will surely take some time. On that note, I also want to reformat my desktop, get it all working without its shitty memory leak, find out why my laptop will randomly disconnect, and set up a remote desktop on my PC so I can access it on the desktop... from 5 feet away. So lazy to even want to do that, and even lazier to not have done it yet.

I do not believe that reformating your troublesome desktop is good to attempt when you haven't slept yet.

Tashina wants to go see the Dark Knight. I am totally up for seeing it again, and I convinced her to see it at the Imax. It's playing at the Pacific Science Center through to September, so there's plenty of time. If any of my local friends are interested (Liam, Dawn+Drew, Shushu, Rachel, [AMY, if you lived here right now] etc, etc), it will probably be a weekend, but not this coming weekend. Suggestions are welcomed. Txt me through my profile, or leave a comment, or whatever for ideas.


Jan. 16th, 2008 09:55 am
tokimi: (tired)
Insomnia's a bitch. I went to bed at a reasonable hour yesterday, I slept for 8 hours. I got up and showered. I dozed off killing time, I didn't wake until 5pm. Then stayed up all night, not really tired until now. So I'm going to run the errands that need to be done today.


Insomnia sucks. I even took my sleeping pills to get to bed at a reasonable hour. I think I'm going to start taking them at 11, no matter what.
tokimi: (help)
Can't sleep. Gonna end up taking sleeping pills to assist with that.

Need to speak with my old-therapist's supervisor. Things haven't been going well. Everything's a step backwards despite getting permanent housing. My uncle's taking forever about my trust fund money, my phone's off because of it. I'm cut off from people I need to be able to reach. My sister didn't call me like she said she was going to this last weekend. I'm getting edgier, and more despondant, and I can -tell- things are getting worse. I can't concentrate on my writing, even when I try. I need to speak with someone, and get back on track with my therapy.
tokimi: (help)
The Within Temptation concert I've been waiting on for monthes is tonight. Arch and Decky have both been to it a few shows earlier on their tour and said they were awesome. Plus side, the tickets were only $10. Downside, it's at El Corazon.

The only problem? I came undone at the seams last night. Completely breaking down in tears for no real reason for a few hours and enslaved to insomnia. I stayed up until 10:30-11am, and took a 2 hour nap. I'm exhausted and emotionally drained.

And I'm debating not going to the concert. :/


tokimi: (Default)

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